How do you feel ready to change your life, whether a big change or small? How do we stop pushing that point further and further along, keeping it in the vague future?
There are some practical things you can do. For instance, if you want to move to another country you would of course have to do some research and make a few plans and probably save some money. But, there’s a point where research becomes a trap, a way to procrastinate and avoid the scary part, which is actually making the leap.
This is where so many get stuck, and it’s not for lack of desire or even commitment. Can you think of a dream you’ve been thinking about and reading about and planning for years on end? Where is the point that it stalls? Fear.
Our fearful, critical inner minds start throwing every worst case scenario at us at such a rate and with such force that of course we feel overwhelmed. It doesn’t help that no matter how well we plan we know we can’t predict the future.
From my experience erasing this fear is not a real option. You have to be brave. You have to walk right through and get to the other side of fear.
I tell myself I only have to be brave for long enough to do that one pivotal thing and after that I’m just following along on the new path. Maybe it’s buying that one way ticket, or giving notice at work. After that one thing, your fear will morph into a weird fear/exhilaration as every other decision will just be following along from that first big one, smoothing out the edges and preparing your landing on the other side of that big fear.
I can tell you from my own experiences of moving across the country and across the world several times, as well as changing jobs and careers, that I never approach these changes without fear. I rarely really feel ready. But every time I have managed to be brave long enough to make the pivotal decision.
After making the pivotal decision (or rather action) there is a weird in-between period you have to navigate where you’ll wonder if you’ve just made a terrible decision. Just focus on the fact that you’re doing this, this is for real, and you’re not taking it back. This is your new life, and you’re living it even when it’s scary.
In no time you will begin to disassociate with your life before the decision. Really, it’s kind of freaky how quickly this will happen. Every time I’ve quit a job I’ve agonized for weeks over giving notice, even when I was in really terrible work situations. Yet, after making it official I almost instantly begin to disassociate in my mind. The job begins to become a part of my past, even if I’m still working that last week. We’ve all experienced this before, as school ended. So, if you’re still having trouble making that pivotal action, meditate on that after-feeling, how you will feel when on you’re on your way. Show your subconscious that it’s not all krakens and seas serpents in those uncharted waters.
If you’ve gone through this or have something to add, please share?